the song by the backstreet boys keep repeating in my head. Cant exactly remember the title but it goes like.. “Quit playing games with my heart…” anyway here i am again, trying to pull myself back from the brink again. I’m really very tired of the guessing game… wah lao she’s like the signboard of some cheng tng stall :”hot and cold…” Haiz…to think i could come up with something so lame even at this point. I seem to be in this Matrix like situation: red pill or blue pill? I’m so afraid that when i reach out, i touch nothing, instead of a solid. Illusions, thats all (which is 80% confirmed). I dun want to break this illusion though, albeit for selfish reasons i guess… maintaining this illusions is very costly though, as costly as causing me to lose focus for no reason, tiredness and so on. And yes black moods that come and go very easily…
i really feel like giving up. why am i such a wimp?
to hell with myself larz. I’m such a loser.
haiz.
two more days to bowling comp. i hope people will support bowling………i hope…
though i dun see any hope today….
really.
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