silens-silentium

January 20, 2008

Revised Resolutions

Filed under: Life, Musings — Nicholas @ 5:16 am

I promised myself that I shall make an effort to stop making emotional posts and posting songs (to convey my mood). Speaking of which, that Jay Chou song below is just a song I’m trying to memorize. Therefore, I shall NOT post anything emotional.

Instead, let me talk about my bank balance. What happened just now was, I was waiting for 4N to arrive, when my PDA-phone died. Again. Never mind, so I turned to my ipod nano. Headphones died, only the left side had sound. Never mind, I waited for 10 minutes (my friend’s bus arrived like almost immediately. Lucky bastard.), gave up and tried to withdraw money to cab home. TO MY FUCKING SHOCK AND HORROR, ONLY THE CARD CAME OUT. I thought, well, maybe the ATM machine was faulty, but just decided to check bank balance just in case. Amount left in bank? $19.21. Amazing.

Apart from trying to get my phone working again, I was trying to recall, how exactly did I squander $500 in approximately (slightly more than) 2 weeks. Anyway, just for self-housekeeping purposes, I’ll list down everything below:

$112 for the new pair of shoes (to claim from Dad)
$60 for transport (EZlink)
$42 for the pineapple tarts (Lian owes me $6)
$50 for school books (to claim from Dad)
$40 for the Eagles: Hell Freezes Over XRCD
$36 for the pink shirt (to claim from Dad)
$30 for Ken’s birthday dinner (including supper)
$26 for 2 cab rides (to campus and from jh’s house)
$20 for 2 movies (AVP2 and Vexille, including drinks)
$15 for Kbox (Crest owes me $5)
$5 for the Ipod nano DAC

Including the amount I have left in my bank and wallet (about $20 rounded down), that’s $456. Let’s round it up to $460. Taking away $10 for seeing the doctor, and another $10 on a Subway meal, it means I’ve spent a total of only $20 this week. Which sounds reasonable.

Assuming I claimed $200 from my dad, and got back all the money people owe me (those listed above), and add in the $20 remaining, I will have approximately $230 dollars left. Which means, I spent $270, not including the $50+++ dollars I spent on New Year’s Eve getting a headache.

To continue calculating, take away $60 from $270 because of transport (inevitable costs), it means I’ve spent $210. Deducting the amount spent on one-off goods (XRCD, tarts, Kbox, movies, cab, doctor, equaling roughly $140), it means I’ve spent ONLY $70 on food and drinks,  including the $30 for Ken’s birthday dinner (and dessert), $10 for subway, eating the sze char at Bedok Interchange, eating at Macdonalds while having flu, eating 2 lunches in school, eating at Aston’s Express then chilling out at Red Dot Cafe, and eating and chilling out tonight. Okay, take out Ken’s dinner; a one-off affair too, so it means I’ve ONLY spent $40 on food since Ken’s dinner.

Given that I’ve spent a total of $60+$40=$100 on unavoidable items, it means I spent $170 on avoidable, one-off items. I thought I was a glutton. Wrong, I’m a fucking spendthrift. This does not include various other niggling stuff (which cancels out because my bank indeed had more than $500, about $550 in the bank then), and the $50+++ I blew on New Year’s Eve. If that is included, it brings the total amount to a total of $220 spent on avoidable stuff within 3 weeks.
I mentioned about revised resolutions. To make my life easier, I shall forget about the third resolution mentioned previously (to keep in line with existing principles), and substitute it instead with this new resolution: To cut down spending on avoidable, one-off items unless absolutely necessary, by at least 60%, which means keeping it to below $100.

I’m rather lucky I still have about $230 left for the rest of the month. I still owe Junming $86 (or $88 for PES 2008). I’m targeting a savings of at least $400 by the end of the semester (assuming I remain single, which is not much of an assumption anyway).

I’m still dumbfounded by the way I spend money. And wow, I’m not a glutton actually. Amazing!

January 18, 2008

????

Filed under: Song Lyrics — Nicholas @ 12:08 pm

???????????
???????????
??????????????

???????????
???????????
??????? ??????
Chorus (X2)
???? ???? ????
??????????
???????

Repeat till end.

- ???? ; ???

January 17, 2008

Dismal Day

Filed under: Life, Song Lyrics — Nicholas @ 8:50 pm

I look into my morning mirror
And it reveals some things to me
That I had not been able to see
I saw someone that I’m not sure I want to be
An empty lonely face was starin’ back at me
All and all, I would have to say
It’s been a rather dismal day

The afternoon was slow in coming
I drug myself outside the face the people
That I knew would be there
And though they walked along pretending not to care
I knew behind my back they’d point and laugh and stare
All and all, I would have to say
It’s been a rather dismal day

And now the evening shadow’s falling
I guess it’s best I lay my hopes to rest
For no one’s calling my name
I sit and wait behind a door that’s never knocked on
I live in silence like my phone that’s never talked on
All and all, I would have to say
It’s been a rather dismal day

All and all, I would have to say
It’s been a rather dismal day
All and all, I would have to say
It’s been a rather dismal day

- Dismal Day, Bread

I hate to post lyrics of 2 songs within hours of each other, but then this song really summed up my day.

Lost Without Your Love

Filed under: Musings, Song Lyrics — Nicholas @ 5:27 pm

Lost and all alone
I always thought that I could make it on my own
Since you left I hardly make it through the day
My tears get in the way
And I need you back to stay

I wander through the night
And search the world to find
the words to make it right
All I want is just the way it used to be
With you here close to me
I’ve got to make you see

That I’m lost without your love
Life without you isn’t worth the trouble of
I’m as helpless as a ship without a wheel
A touch without a feel
I can’t believe it’s real…

And someday soon I’ll wake
And find my heart won’t have to break

Yes I’m lost without your love
Life without you isn’t worth the trouble of
All I want is just the way it used to be
I need you here with me
Oh darlin’ can’t you see…
If we had love before
We can have it back once more

-Bread, Lost Without Your Love

I listened to the song for the first time, despite my dad purchasing this album many years ago. Then I was in the throes of teenage rebellion, and often heard without listening. Now I listen all the time, too much in fact, that I seem to have lost my voice, or forgotten how to speak.

Anyway, this song are for those who have fallen out of love. I wish I was in that category; after all, it would mean that I was actually in one before. But I digress. It’s a short, emotional song; those who are interested in this song can just ask me for it actually.

Tired.

Filed under: Issues Close to Heart, Life, Musings — Nicholas @ 8:16 am

Yesterday tired me out more than I expected. My bones are aching, to say the least.

Maybe I am trying to bite off more than I can chew. Oh well. Time to go to school.

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