I’m all alone at the Science foyer now, as I type this post.
I’m supposed to be guarding the goods for the club bazaar, slated to start in a few hours’ time. Reason why? Some vendors had decided to set up their booths early, and bought their stuff along. This apparently was totally unexpected to the organizing committee, who had not gotten any manpower to stayover to look after the stuff. Who else but for the chairperson to stay back, alone?
The music resonates through the empty walkway, and a gentle breeze blows through. The feeling, to be truthful, feels almost like despair. Two empty cans stand before me: One can of Nescafe, which I bought just before the last of the group left, and a can of Soya Bean milk, which I bought just 15 minutes ago at the nearby vending machine. You can still see the condensation on the can; the droplets of water slowly sliding down, seeping into the tablecloth, and then beginning it’s next step in the cycle, evaporation.
How am I coping? Until a minute ago, I had people keeping me company online via MSN. Thanks to all, especially my godsister, whom until this morning I’d not spoken to in such a long while. What a coincidence that I spotted you at Comex. Hopefully this will make it easier for us to keep in touch from now on. Telling you about what had transpired so far has considerably made things easier to stomach, in a way.
It’s amazing sometimes, that at 4+ in the morning, you see a wide awake bunch of people walking/strolling around in campus. Healthy lifestyle in contrast to an extremely unhealthy lifestyle in action here. Those people were probably on their way to their normal workout I believe, while here I am, trying to crank my brain into action by typing incessantly on the keyboard, so that I’d be able to understand the readings I plan on finishing later, after writing this post.
How long more till the set-up committee arrives? Less than 4 hours, theoretically. Am I angry? No longer. Do I regret taking up this position? Sometimes, but the fact that I’m still committing time after time proves that I haven’t lost faith, either in the club, in the members, or in myself.
What next? Another 2 more sleepless nights, give myself a pat on the back, and it’s back to studying. Finally, not excluding of course, the debrief, and looking ahead to the other upcoming events. Will I eventually give in? Maybe, but it’d be a very sad day indeed, because it just proves that I’m still not competent enough to survive outside my current comfort zone; and as such, unable to extend my comfort zone.
Just one lonely night at the Science Foyer.